News that the wonderful JK Rowling earns £5 per second, (yes, you read that correctly, FIVE BIG ONES EACH AND EVERY SECOND), brings pathetic and frankly, desperate thoughts to the fore here on the Dunghill of Destitution.
I'm thinking about putting together a begging letter for Ms Rowling. I know that she is not averse to making donations to the less fortunate (The Labour Party, for example.) By my reckoning, if she can spare me ten minutes of her time, our current fiscal perturbations could be alleviated. If her schedule is too tight, a couple of minutes would remedy our winter firewood problem and prevent family-wide digital frostbite.
So, Joanne, hon, if you happen to be having a guilty google of yourself, and you alight on my humble blog...would you mind considering helping out a fellow author? (Yeah, I'm a writer, of sorts. I don't do wizards, so there's no need to worry about a conflict of interests).
Dear Blogchums...do you have any tips for the skint? Have you ever written a corking begging letter? Missives to Father Christmas don't count. Do you have any tips for success? Rules? Definite no-nos?
Come on...don't make me beg. I still have my pride you know...well...actually...no I don't. Ha ha!!
- Mya
- I left London after sixteen years when the congestion charge was introduced. I now live a pleasantly uncongested life with Spouse and Sprog halfway up a mountain in the French Pyrenees. Yes, it's true, France is another country...but the country-side is another planet! The adjustments are ongoing, sometimes painful, often interesting. I recently completed my first novel (edgy, commercial fiction for women, if anyone's interested!)and have a second one under construction. I welcome the interest of literary agents,publishing houses and chocolate manufacturers. Email: mya.france@gmail.com © Missing You Already, 2007/2008/2009(written content)
If you fancy a little more of me...read me here...
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10 comments:
I'd be happy to hold her down while you relieve her of her checkbook. That's an obscene amount of money, and truly, after a while what the hell do you need that much for?
It's the people like us - who are made or broken by 3,000 big ones (sorry. no pound sign on my American computer) that need all those zeros adding up.
But damn. I sure do like the way she writes. Better her than Paris Hilton.
This is a true story. I once met someone who was high up in an oil company, and he'd been invited to a fundraisingy type of dinner at a Scottish university. He was introduced to someone called Jo (this was years ago, when the Harry Potter thing was really new), and he chatted to her all evening. They then got onto lines of business, and he asked her "What do you do?" trying to work out why his wife was rolling her eyes at him and tapping her head in a 'duuh' kind of way. She said "I write children's books". He said "Oh, that's notoriously underpaid, isn't it?" His wife was miming being hung at this point. "Would I have heard of anything you've written?" he asked...
He now lives in Belgium. I don't think that fact and the story I've told you are connected, but you never know.
I just want the spare pocket change of a very rich Middle Eastern sheik. Now, how do I go about that? Can I write him a letter and beg or should I become a thieving pickpocket?
Give up on the cash economy altogether Mya and go for barter/craft/knitting/cake/anarchy. You will probably need a still in your basement to be really popular with your neighbours though...
Can't you teach someone English? That's usually good money for old rope.
You could start a bank. And then go cap in hand to the government asking for a bail out (sorry, rescue package) of £23.8bn?
You could write a threatening ransom letter to Robbie Williams saying unless he pays you £5mn he'll never get his sense of music back.
You could write yet another threatening ransom letter ro Elton John saying he'll never get his hair back if (etc). I'd suggest £360k because he's fallen on hard times lately.
Are these any good for you?
:)
It is obscene to earn so much. Anyway money isn't everything.
Meow!
But is JK Rowling happy?
(bloody ecstatic I'd imagine!)
No, but if you pick up any good tips, will you pass them on? (Actually, I like the one about the bank!)
Wow - that is incredible - £5 per second!
Sorry no tips for making money - but if you think of anything pls pass them on. :-)
You already have the solution to money making within your grasp...'thieving pykey, rifling the heavy pockets of city folk for e-gadgetry' Hitch a lift into Paris and Pierre's your uncle (or probation officer, depending on how things go). Incidentally, there's no point threatening anybody with a spring of heather unless they have a plant allergy.
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